You may or may not know this about me... I'm a bit of a news junkie. I like to know everything I can about news stories, especially big news stories. I typically look at lots of different sources and read as much as I can.
Not this time.
I took Friday off so I could attend a Christmas party that night. I am so thankful I had the day off. As I got the news alerts on my phone about what was happening in Connecticut, I found myself desperately hoping that the media outlets were wrong. Maybe the numbers were exaggerated. Oh how I hoped. I was at Chick-fil-A with my girls and couldn't eat my lunch. But I pretended everything was fine.
As I watched them play in the play area, I just couldn't wrap my brain around the heinous murder of children...most of them not much older than my daughter, Sydney. I was overcome with an actual feeling of sickness. And have since stopped reading and watching all coverage of the story. Including from Channel 7.
I know as news people we have covered lots of horrific stories. Even mass murders. But it was so different this time. I've been trying to figure out why and I assume it's because I'm now a parent. Everyone said that my perceptive as a jjournalist would change when I became a mom. I didn't believe them. But they were right. It all changes. My heart absolutely breaks for those parents that will never get to see their sweet babies on this earth again. I simply can not fathom what that would be like. And pray like crazy that I'll never have to know.
As a news anchor, we're supposed to have empathy when we read stories and even show some emotion. But I have to be honest, if I did that with this story I'd be crying every time it's mentioned. So forgive me, if I look or sound emotion-less while reading these stories... it is the best I can do. If being a mom makes me less of anchor... so be it. We all have our limits. Apparently the senseless attack of sweet, innocent souls is mine.
I will continue to pray for the families, emergency personal, and entire Newtown community... as well as continued protection and safety for the most innocent of us. All of our children.